Eight Simple Rules

Bill Simmons of ESPN provided us with the eight responsibilities of a good baseball fan in a recent mailbag:
1. Take your hat off for the National Anthem
2. Don’t take your shirt off
3. Don’t bring your baseball glove if you’re over 13
4. Don’t wear a jersey with your own name on it
5. Don’t run onto the field
6. Don’t reach into the field of play to grab a pop-up or ground ball if it could adversely affect your team
7. Don’t boo one of your own players unless it’s absolutely warranted [listening Philadelphia?]
8. Don’t throw up.

A solid list. I would modify #4 so that it’s ok to wear a jersey with your name if there is or had once been a player on the team with the same last name (“David Pujols” — I like that). Otherwise, you’re just a tool.

I’d also add rule 9: if you catch a foul ball, give it to the nearest kid under 12. This looks good to the lady fans.

Any other additions?


0 responses to “Eight Simple Rules

  1. Don’t wave to the television cameras when you’re sitting behind home plate while talking on a cell phone!!

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